I've admired your writing for a long time, and this might be one of my all-time favourites of yours! Reading this, I could feel (and have felt) everything you described so viscerally. I moved here 15 years ago, and I'm now a fellow dual citizen too. That ache of never fully belonging in either place never goes away, but it lessens every time I feel more at home here. Thank you for articulating and sharing this beautiful piece.
Congratulations! As someone in the same boat as your friend with the pints – born and raised in the city – I often experience the diametrically opposite phenomenon: that so many people move to this city by choice or necessity that they forget there is such a thing as a native Londoner.
Well written it reminded me of so long ago. When I was in college I spent a semester abroad in Japan. Upon arriving I realized I was all sorts of out of place. I could feel myself being seen. I spent a decent part of my young adult life trying not to be seen. I wanted to be invisible again. No one treated me poorly, no one spat at my feet or anything but there was a "look" where in my head I was screaming I wish I was invisible. Another student let me know, it's "how I was dressed more than anything". Frankly my attempt to blend in was non-existent. It wasn't something 24 year old me considered. Such an eye opening experience and it's one I think a lot of Americans fail to experience. Young me expected the world to allow me room to breathe, where in some spaces you can breathe so long as it's not loud, or too different a breath.
I've admired your writing for a long time, and this might be one of my all-time favourites of yours! Reading this, I could feel (and have felt) everything you described so viscerally. I moved here 15 years ago, and I'm now a fellow dual citizen too. That ache of never fully belonging in either place never goes away, but it lessens every time I feel more at home here. Thank you for articulating and sharing this beautiful piece.
Aw, can’t express how much this comment means to me. Sending you so much love ❤️
Congratulations! As someone in the same boat as your friend with the pints – born and raised in the city – I often experience the diametrically opposite phenomenon: that so many people move to this city by choice or necessity that they forget there is such a thing as a native Londoner.
That verrrrrrrry true. Hadn’t thought of that! And thank you 🫶🏻
Well written it reminded me of so long ago. When I was in college I spent a semester abroad in Japan. Upon arriving I realized I was all sorts of out of place. I could feel myself being seen. I spent a decent part of my young adult life trying not to be seen. I wanted to be invisible again. No one treated me poorly, no one spat at my feet or anything but there was a "look" where in my head I was screaming I wish I was invisible. Another student let me know, it's "how I was dressed more than anything". Frankly my attempt to blend in was non-existent. It wasn't something 24 year old me considered. Such an eye opening experience and it's one I think a lot of Americans fail to experience. Young me expected the world to allow me room to breathe, where in some spaces you can breathe so long as it's not loud, or too different a breath.
Beautifully said. My thoughts exactly!
I am ashamed of my people